Having just gone to China, I was in a foreign movie kind of mood.  In fact, I was looking for a chick flick releasing in theaters in Hong Kong, but there weren’t any during my stay.  Instead, I ended up watching a Michelle Yeoh movie, Reign of Assassins.  It was damn good actually.  Anyway.

On my plane ride back from China, I thought I should catch up on some chick flicks.  They actually had 500 Days of Summer, but I have already reviewed that and I was still itching for a foreign movie.  Fortunately, they did have L’arnacoeur, which I was thinking of watching anyway, so it all works out.

L’arnacoeur (aka The Heartbreaker) is a romantic comedy about Alex Lippi, whose profession involves breaking up couples.  He explains that women in relationships come in 3 categories:  1) happy, 2) knowingly unhappy, and 3) unhappy without admitting it.  He only deals with the 3rd category.  His tool is seduction.  He is actually doing them a service by freeing them from their unhappiness, which is underlined by the dozen women shown thanking him after each success.  Alex is accompanied by his sister, Mélanie, and her husband, Marc, who provide support by gathering intel and running interference.  They conduct their business with honorable rules – relatively speaking.

However, short on money and in debt to a loan shark, Alex and his team is forced to take their most difficult mission yet – to break up a happy couple.  The target is a beautiful, successful wine connoisseur, Juliette Van Der Becq.  Her fiancé is a rich bloke from England who feeds the needy with food banks he has put together.  He’s truly prince charming.  Armed only with the knowledge that Juliette likes Wham! and Dirty Dancing and had vanished for 1 year during college, Alex sets his plan into motion.  The only obstacle – aside from the loan shark’s ogre-sized goon and prince charming – is the love he begins to feel for Juliette.

I don’t know if it’s because everything is in French, or if it’s because I was on a 13 hour flight washing my face with Johnny Walker, but L’arnacoeur was surprisingly entertaining.  It’s like watching a semi-skilled group of spies disarming an emotional time bomb.  They fumble their way through it and somehow nail the perfect landing.  Alex has this arrogant but potent swagger about him.  I love how he’s able to embody the spirit of any woman’s idle man.  It’s comically unbelievable and reminiscent of sappy love stories.  The whole cast and story has a unrealistic wackiness to it.  L’arnacoeur a romantic comedy that doesn’t take itself seriously and in doing so it delivers a refreshing change from its American counterparts.

Bro-Approved

I’ll be in China for 2 weeks for vacation.  Chinese chick flicks anyone?!

I will play catch up when I get back, but for now why not read some of The Best and The Worst chick flicks I’ve reviewed here.

I wrote about the definition of a chick flick early on in the year.

My usual routine includes going through some of my friend’s shared blog entries.  One of them caught my eye because it concerned romantic comedies.  Give it a read here.

Any comments?

I’ve been enduring over a week of jury duty.  I had to grab lunch quickly yesterday, so I decided to walk a few blocks down to Grand Central Market and I bought 2 carne asada tacos.  They really over did it with the carne asada, but i’m not complaining at $2 a pop.  I decided to walk across the street to Angel’s Flight and Angel’s Knoll for lunch.  Does this sound familiar?  Well, do you recognize this view?

This is where they filmed 500 Days of Summer.  This is Tom’s favorite spot in the city.  Dead center of the photo, you see the Continental Building, which Tom mentioned is the 1st high-rise building in Los Angeles.  You also see the parking lots slightly to the left behind the tree leaves.

Additionally, no one was sitting on the actual bench they filmed on, so I figured it was as good a place as any on which to spill my taco fillings.  Good lunch!

In Going the Distance, Garrett (Justin Long) and Erin (Drew Barrymore) meet while arguing over a lost game of Centipede.  Video games turn into beer bottles.  Beer bottles turn into bongs.  Bongs turn into sex.  Their apparent one night stand turns into 6 incredible weeks.  Unfortunately, 6 is all they have.  Erin’s internship at the New York Chronicle is over and she’s headed back to San Francisco.  Unwilling to call it quits, Garrett suggests that they have a long distance relationship to hold on to what they believe is a good thing.

Easier said than done, but the title says it all.  They really do go the distance:  They talk daily on the phone, they open Christmas presents via video chat online, and they even have phone sex.  Unfortunately, nothing beats the real thing.  Even with a few plane rides every now and then, seeing each other every 3 months starts to wear them down emotionally.  When times get tough, Erin leans on a handsome coworker with a European accent.  Garrett has his roommate Dan (Charlie Day) to give him pep talks while on the toilet – under an “open door policy” – and Box (Jason Sudeikis) who’s trying to bang 50+ year old women and transport them back in time with his 70′s porn star mustache.  Like I said – easier said than done.

Long distance relationships are nothing new in the realm of chick flicks.  The story is certainly predictable and trite, but I was slapping my knee and not my forehead.  Going the Distance is heavy on the comedy, so it makes for great entertainment.  And even better, it’s rated R!  That means foul language, partial nudity (albeit  male) and outrageously memorable conversations.

Dan: A man’s cry.  You know what I’m talking about right? *lowers head and pretends to sob*

Box: It looks like you’re trying to suck your own dick.

Dan: If I wanted to suck my own dick, I’d lay back and throw my legs over my shoulders.

Box: *lowers head and imitates sob* What does that look like to you?

Dan: It looks like you’re trying to suck your dick.

Box: So you suck your own dick?

Dan: Yea.

Box: You cut your own hair and suck your own dick.  Fuck, you’re like a Swiss Army Knife.

I would have been perfectly comfortable watching it with a bunch of dudes.  In fact, ladies looking for a nice wholesome chick flick this weekend – stay away!  If you liked 40-Year-Old Virgin or Knocked Up, Going the Distance won’t disappoint.  It’s a chick flick a la Judd Apatow.

Bro-Approved

Didn’t we watch this movie already?  Yea.  All the way back in April of 2010.  Back then it was called The Back-Up Plan.  I commend Hollywood’s perseverance.  Flop after flop, they just don’t give up.

The Switch stars Jennifer Aniston and Jason Bateman.  Kassie (Aniston) is sick of hoping for the stars to align and for her to meet the right guy, fall in love, get married, and have a family.  Wally (Bateman) is her neurotic, cynical BFF who’s suppressed his feelings for her for years.  There is obviously some chemistry between Wally and Kassie, but neither of them has ever made a move so they’ve entered “the friend zone”.  Kassie decides to take matters into her own hands and become a single mother via Roland, a sperm donor.  At her insemination party, with the virtue contained in alcohol and the brilliance of those wash their livers with it, Wally replaces Roland’s sperm with his own.  Of course, having drank so much and masturbating to a picture of Diane Sawyer, Wally can’t remember a damn thing.  Years down the road, Kassie returns from Minnesota with her son, Sebastian, who’s now 5 1/2.  Roland re-enters the picture and tries to take his place as Sebastian’s supposed father.  Meanwhile, Wally begins to see striking similarities between him and Sebastian and he begins to wonder.

The Switch is a huge step up from The Back-Up Plan.  The writing is better.  The acting is better.  And I only slapped my forehead a handful of times.  That being said, The Switch isn’t spectacular either.

Jennifer Aniston, please as a public service – stop making chick flicks.  Just stop it.  I know you’re filthy rich from Friends and you occasionally get bored, but don’t do movies simply because you can.  I’m tired of seeing the same Jennifer Aniston over and over.  Go do Derailed Part 2 or something.  Luckily, Jason Bateman is able to carry the slack, though not without help.  The interaction between Wally and Sebastian is the best part of this movie.  Their affinity to one another is believable and Sebastian’s replication of Wally’s neurotic and cynical personality is wonderfully entertaining.  Wally on dealing with bullies:

Wally: You know you’re going to have to stand up to him eventually.

Sebastian: But I don’t want to.

Wally: Then he’ll continue to kick your ass.

Unfortunately that doesn’t make up for everything this movie lacks – or has, rather.  It has all your standard chick flick moments and follows the tried and true formula for disappointing the unfortunate male spectators.  The Switch is mediocre and barely passes as entertainment.

Rated Chick

Have you ever had a feeling that life was meant to be much more?  Family, work, and 40 short years later you would like to have no regrets, but have you done anything about it?  Elizabeth Gilbert did.  She had a husband, a home and a successful career, but what she didn’t have was happiness and the genuine sense of fulfillment.  After sulking in the vacuum left by her divorce, she decides to travel to 3 different countries over the course of one year.  During her journey she indulges in the fine foods and spirits of Italy, meditates and prays in India, and searches for “balance” in Indonesia.  “Liz” shared her experiences through her New York Bestseller, Eat, Pray, Live and now it’s a screenplay.  There you go.  If you’re afraid of not having income for a year, remember that you might just score a book deal.

If I had to pick something missing in my own life, I would say that I lack “worldly experience”.  I’d like to experience life more.  Heck, I haven’t ever been outside of the US.  I must have lied to myself a dozen times about taking a similar leap and escaping the trappings of my metropolitan habitat.  Even though I can relate to a story of soul searching whilst traveling the world, I still found it really hard to empathize with Liz.  Also, I wasn’t convinced that she had really learned anything significant.  In each part of Liz’s trip, she supposedly has a moment of clarity.  Somehow she learns to forgive herself for leaving her husband and somehow she learns to love again.  How?  I didn’t see it.  I’m pretty sure I wasn’t sleeping, although the rainbow unicorns were suspiciously out of place in India…

Sure, it can be really difficult to squeeze 3 stories plus overhead into one movie, but it’s not impossible.  Eat, Pray, Love just didn’t flow well.  It felt a bit choppy and each part of her trip felt short-lived.  The relationships she made along the way served as an extended family from which she grew and learned.  However, these relationships weren’t developed enough – not even with Felipe, the final love interest of the story.  I have a feeling that the book didn’t translate well to 133 minutes of screen time, but now I just don’t care enough to read the book.

I wouldn’t call this a chick flick.  Guy or girl, I’d say skip this one.  Ladies, read the book.  For the fellas, check out the satirical work of Andrew Gottlieb, Drink, Play, F@#k.  Similar to Eat, Pray, Love, this story chronicles the year of a recently divorced man searching for meaning in this crazy world.  His adventures lead him through binging in Ireland, gambling in Las Vegas, and fornicating in Thailand.  Guys, unfortunately you’ll have to actually read to enjoy this story – no movie or CliffNotes.

*** This review contains some spoilers ***

This is another addition to The Best and The Worst.  Most notably, this is the first movie that I’ve seen since I started this blog that made it into the category.

iridescent – adjective: showing luminous colors that seem to change when seen from different angles

When I hear “romantic comedy” I think of 20 something year olds in New York swapping corny lines via Twitter at a bar.  Flipped takes a more adolescent perspective on love in a quainter town and in a quainter time.  Interestingly enough, even though the main characters are children, the movie targets an adult crowd.  Not because there is adult content, but because it takes an adult who has gone through life’s lessons to appreciate the complex and pithy analogy and irony.  Although in one intense scene a mom ushered her children out of the theater, don’t bring your 4 year olds.

Flipped is a story about Bryce Loski and Juli Baker, both of whom narrate the story.  The movie begins with Bryce’s perspective.

Bryce’s Perspective: He just moved into town.  He’s in the moving truck helping his father with the boxes until Juli interrupts and tries to help.  His father emphasizes that there are valuables in the boxes, but she can’t seem to take a clue.  “Shouldn’t you go help your mother in the kitchen, Bryce?”  After a second, the confusion on his face vanishes once he understands his father’s ploy.  He hops out of the truck and Juli follows closely behind.  She puts her arm around him.  In defense against cooties he flails his arms, but she somehow gets a hold of his hand.  He looks right at her face in disgust.  Fortunately, his mom comes out.  He resorts to his only defense for a boy his age – he hides behind his mom.  Juli is so annoying!

Juli’s Perspective: Bryce just moved into town.  Attracted by his “dazzling” eyes, she offers to help, but not 2 minutes pass and his father sends him into the house.  She could tell from his face he didn’t want to go, so she went after him to see if he’d like to play for a bit before he got stuck inside.  To her surprise, Bryce takes her hand and looks lovingly into her eyes.  Unfortunately, his mom comes out.  Embarrassed about his feelings for her, Bryce hides behind his mom.  Bryce is so shy!

The entire movie follows this pattern.  Bryce and Juli take turns describing their thoughts and motives.  It’s interesting to watch their contradicting thoughts converge into a single stream of unfolding events.  The audience also gets a sense of Bryce’s and Juli’s personalities.  Although Bryce is the handsome young kid at school their vastly different narration proves which of the two has more character.  The first scene, Bryce’s and Juli’s first encounter, gives the false impression that Flipped is a love story.  It kind of is.  But although the thread that holds everything together is the love story between Bryce and Juli the fabric of the story is substance.  The substance of character.  Each character’s role provides a perspective and a life lesson.  The fulcrum upon which these morals are balanced is best represented by the sycamore tree – the gem of the town.

The sycamore tree has many symbolic interpretations – all of which are equally appropriate for the story and its characters.  Vanity.  Juli is enthralled by those “dazzling” eyes and is irrationally in love with Bryce.  Bryce is equally irrational in his disdain of Juli.  Bryce’s father is especially guilty of this sin.  He washes away the pain of lost aspirations with bourbon and takes comfort in condescension.  He refuses Juli’s fresh eggs produced by her hens simply because of the Bakers’ disheveled front yard.  However, the sycamore tree could also represent divinity, protection and strength.  Juli’s favorite spot in town is the peak of the sycamore tree.  Here she reveled in the sunset igniting the surrounding clouds and the wind kissing her skin.  She suddenly understood what her father meant when he said the whole is greater than the sum of its parts.  Juli could see “the whole” landscape.  She could even see it in Bryce, but is he greater or less than the sum of his parts?  When the tree’s owner decided to cut it down, Juli defended it by remaining in the tree.  But when it eventually came down, her vanity, her irrational love, began to come down as well.  Juli questions “the whole” that is Bryce Loski.  Likewise, Bryce begins to see Juli from a different angle.

Flipped is a gem in itself.  I laughed.  I cried.  No I didn’t, but it was very moving.  And the writing is pretty good.  If you enjoyed The Wonder Years or if you ever daydreamed about that one girl you kissed when you were 13, you’ll get a nostalgic kick out of Flipped.  If you don’t know The Wonder Years and you’ve never been kissed, you’ll still love it.  It’s flippin’ great.

On August 13th, movie-goers will experience a life changing experience as they travel the world with Julia Roberts in Eat, Pray, Love.  But until then, why not take a manly, hedonistic trip with Andrew Gottlieb, author of Drink, Play, F@#k.  It’s a parody of the best-selling book Eat, Pray, Love.  Travel to Ireland, Las Vegas, and Thailand and experience lethal amounts of alcohol, irresponsible gambling, and rabbit-like quantities of fornication.  Why learn something when you can learn nothing?  Read Drink, Play, F@#k, pound a 6 pack and then watch Eat, Pray, Love.  You will be forever changed.  I assure you.

The week She’s Out of My League came out, I opted to watch Remember Me instead.  My justification was that it was the worse of the two and that reviewing it and spreading word would be for the greater good.  It turns out that Remember Me was better than expected and She’s Out of My League was not fantastic.

She’s Out of My League is about a nobody named Kirk, who through a series of dumb luck lands a date with the lovely Molly.  Molly is a sexy successful law school dropout who’s making tens of thousands per gig as an event planner.  In the words of his best (and worst) friend Stainer, she’s a hard 10 and he’s just a 5.  The rules dictate that you can only jump 2 points, so Molly is way out of Kirk’s league.  Kirk daydreams about becoming a pilot one day, but he’s only gotten as far as working for the TSA.  A nothing compared to Molly’s last beefy, model-like boyfriend – who’s actually a pilot.

So what happens when you mix an attractive 10 with a dorky 5?  Comedy.  Perhaps the most extreme example would be the 1st time Kirk visits Molly’s apartment.  Things get hot and heavy and Molly is grinding on Kirk’s lap.  10 seconds into it, he ejaculates in his pants – at which point her parents decide to pop in and surprise her.  They also bring a dog who apparently likes to sniff out and lick semen.  Now that is a first impression.  Also, shaving your scrotum – not good.  Having your friend shave it for you – worse.

Typically, comedies have 1 extreme character – the Will Ferrell or the Steve Carell.  She’s Out of My League has 2.  Kirk’s best friend Stainer and Molly’s best friend Patty are just off-the-wall ridiculous.  Prompted to turn off her cell phone on a plane, Molly screams,

Excuse me. Are you a plane doctor? No. So shut the hell up.

And what does Stainer think of Patty?  At a hockey game, Molly and Patty leave Stainer and Kirk alone.

Stainer: Kirk that Molly girl is insanely hot.
Kirk: Yeah I know.
Stainer: So you know whats happening? She is setting you up with the bitchy friend. Which will be perfect for you because you like bitches.
Kirk: That’s fine.  Patty is not a bitch. She’s… uh… just different.
Stainer: Yeah different in that she is a bitch and other people aren’t.

It’s entertaining to see Kirk get both bashed and egged on by his friends, coworkers, and even family.  She’s Out of My League might even appeal to some guys as a comedy – and admittedly I did want to watch it when it came out – so it might make you think of it as less of a chick flick, but I assure you that it is.  That got me wondering what makes one assume a movie is a chick flick or a guy flick.  One trend I noticed was that chick flicks usually have an attractive, thoughtful, rich, suave male protagonist while guy flicks usually have dorks.  Maybe that’s why She’s Out of My League might appear to be a guy flick.  Just a thought.

Bro-Approved